Who Are the New York Mets?

As I’m writing this, the Mets are currently beating the snot out of the St. Louis Cardinals 11-0 in the top of the 8th inning. Of course, I’d like to tell you that the Mets do this on a regular basis. I’d even like to tell you that the Mets do this once a week, or once every two weeks. The fact is, they don’t. In fact, I don’t even know what it is that the Mets do on a regular basis. Are they a team that lacks offense but has superior pitching like the San Francisco Giants? Do they have a prolific offense with no pitching like the Philadelphia Phillies? Are they balanced like the Boston Red Sox? The truth is that the Mets have no identity.

The 1969 Mets were  known as the Miracle Mets. The Mets in the 1980s lived like rock stars. They were feared both on and off the field. These Mets? Their legacy will be synonomous with underachieving and mediocrity. Thats their legacy – to be the Mediocre Mets.

As a Mets fan, I don’t know what to expect when I turn on the game. There are days when everything is going well.  For instance, tonight’s game just ended in blowout fashion behind another great start for Fernando Nieve. Why shouldn’t I believe its going to happen again, especially since Johan Santana is starting? Because the Mets are the model of inconsistency. And it starts at the top. The very top of the organization.

I can’t say that the Mets ownership is anything like, say, John Sterling of the LA Clippers. But how can an owner of a team not try as hard as he/she can to put the best product on the field? Going into the offseason, they knew that the team needed a power hitting left fielder, a good second baseman, and at least one reliable starting pitcher. And Adam Dunn, Orlando Hudson, and Randy Wolf/Derek Lowe were all out there. I’ll be the first to admit that neither Randy Wolf nor Derek Lowe really intrigued me as a fan, but I’d rather pay them for however amount of time they wanted than to overpay for Oliver Perez.

(Quick side note: Oliver Perez was making about $6 million last year, and in the offseason, the Mets were the only team to offer Perez a contract. Why did Omar Minaya offer Perez $12 million a year? Just something to think about.)

Fred and Jeff Wilpon were adamant keeping the payroll around $140 million but they picked up Delgado’s $12 million option and gave $12 million a year to Perez. Why not pay the $4 million it would have cost to buy out Delgado, and go after Mark Teixiera? With the $12 million they would have saved by not paying Perez and the $8 million they would have saved by not paying Delgado, they could have outbid for Tex. But hey, hindsight is 20/20.

The 2009 Mets could go down as a great team that was plagued by injuries. Its not much of an excuse but its true. In only three months, the Mets have lost three of their best position players and a good young pitcher to injury. Yet they still remain only 1.5 games behind the Phillies for the division lead. Logically, you could say that once everyone comes back from their injuries, the division is theirs to lose. You could say that but you’d be wrong. I’m not convinced that the Mets can win the division at full strength. They lack the intensity and the fortitude it takes to reclaim what is, essentially, theirs. And even though I’m a fan, I’ll continue to feel that way until the Mets make it through a September without collapsing.

And this is a good year for the Mets to shed this stigma because the NL East is horrible. The Nationals are making a bid to beat out the 1962 Mets as the worst team in baseball history, the Marlins are underachieving despite being right on schedule for another World Series title, the Braves haven’t put together that great team yet, and the Phillies’ lack of pitching is coming back to hurt them. The division is up for grabs. And if the Mets manage to win the division, this Mets fan has to wonder… how much of it was the Mets being good, and how much of it was everyone else being bad? The worst part is that among all the questions we’ll have about the Mets, we’ll still have to ask ourselves who these New York Mets are.

Some People Are Just Plain Stupid

I don’t hate authority. In fact, I think authority is vital to the fabric of our society. However, some people just shouldn’t have any authority at all. These people are stupid and should be relegated to mopping up the floor of the peep show booth in an adult film store. Am I just an angry person? Yes I am. But allow me to explain.

A few nights ago, a few friends and I traveled to our local Applebee’s to enjoy some of their finest wings, nachos, and shrimp. This Applebee’s trip has become something of a tradition among our circle of friends and at this point, we’ve become familiar faces. After all, their slogan is in fact, “Eating good in the neighborhood” and we’re just taking advantage. Now, for for those unfamiliar with the inner workings of the Applebee’s franchise, after 10pm, a customer has the option to order appetizers for half price and order two alcoholic drinks for the price of one. This isn’t the first time we’ve taken part in such a deal because, as I stated before, we do this quite often.

On the night in question, it was a relatively small group of us. We sat down and ordered drinks. Those of us (me) who were required to show identification for alcohol did so and we went about the night, enjoying a rousing playoff basketball game between the Lakers of Los Angeles and the Rockets of Houston. The drinks came and we ordered our food. As always, we ordered appetizers and those who hadn’t ordered enjoyed a plethora of different items. It seemed like a good night. After we ate, we sat around, watched the end of the game and had a good time. It was nearly closing time and the game was almost ending. As the game came to an end, we got up and headed to the door. Thats when our night to an odd turn. As we were leaving, we were approached by our waitress, who stopped two of us, including myself. Apparently, the waitress felt that we took advantage of her by sitting down, only ordering $36 worth of food and drinks, and getting up without leaving an appropriate tip. Granted, her tip was rather minimal, but since when is a tip mandatory? Since when is a waiter/waitress supposed to demand a tip? Now, I’m not that cold-hearted to deny someone a tip regardless of service. And if a waiter/waitress accidentally lets it slip that he or she has a child to feed, that may have an affect on my decision on whether or not to tip. But on the night in question, our waitress not only chastised us because everyone at our table didn’t order, but she went as far as to say that this is the third time we’ve “stiffed” her and that the next time she would refuse to serve us. She continued by pointing to a sign that said after 10pm all patrons must order at least one item. I didn’t know that such a policy existed and perhaps it would have been a smart idea to inform us (the patrons) of this policy prior to ordering. Again, that would have been the smart idea. Which brings me to my next question. What if someone goes to Applebee’s and doesn’t want to eat or drink, but to enjoy the company of his or her peers? Is that a crime? Is said person supposed to wait in the waiting area, or worse yet, the parking lot?

So after being scolded by our waitress with the 4 year old child at home, we left and decided the only logical thing to do would be to go back and do it all over again, this time making sure everyone has exact change in coins. That should teach that loathsome bag of gorilla shit.

Seriously, are you telling me that our table was the deciding factor on whether or not your kid eats? Bring the kid some goddamn mozzarella sticks if its that bad. You’re working a crappy shift on a Monday night. Face it, toots… tips are gonna be few and far between. And I’m not going to make this a race thing. Because its not. I don’t believe that it is. I do believe that its one mongoloid who felt the need to say something that shouldn’t have been said. Tips are not mandatory. You want a tip? Look both ways before crossing the street. Here’s another tip. Always look people in the eye when you shake their hand.

So the next time I go to Applebee’s, I’m going to order boneless wings and two beers, and when the bill comes up to about $8.11, thats what I’m leaving on the table, pennies and all. Not because I’m cheap, but because I can.

Fast forward about twenty minutes. you thought the story was over, didn’t you? No sir. There’s more. Upon arrival at my alma mater to drop some people off, we approached the security gate and on duty was Officer Martinez. Officer Martinez and I have a bit of history. One night, Officer Martinez told us that we had ten minutes to drop off some friends and leave the premises. Now, I had been a student since 2002 and I’m well versed in all of the rules and regulations. We took a little longer than ten minutes to return and Officer Martinez took it upon himself to be SuperCop (with a square badge, no less) and wrote us up. Officer Martinez went on to threaten us with arrest if it happened again. But you know what, thats water under the bridge. I don’t particularly like him, but thats in the past.

On the night in question, Officer Martinez saw that there were six people piled into my 2005 Honda Civic, four of them sitting uncomfortably in the back. Officer Martinez informed us that he couldn’t allow us on campus with four people in the back of the car. Because everyone knows that if you have four people in the back of your car, you’re up to no good. Officer Douchebag said one of us would have to wait at the bus stop. Can someone please tell me what would have happened if we had gone onto the campus with four people in the back seat? Would we hit a pothole, and due to the weight distribution, tumble into the woods and die? Would we have smuggled pure heroin into the school to distribute amongst our peers? Would Osama Bin Laden himself be hidden in the trunk and bomb the so-called “Harvard of Long Island”??? I would love Officer Dickface to give me a legitimate answer to these questions. What if five of the six people in the car required a ride back onto the campus? Would Officer Dickless make someone wait at the bus stop and force the driver to make two trips to the dorms? Some people have waaaaaaaaay too much authority. Officer Colostomy Bag needs to get off of his high horse and leave the police work to actual police.

2009 NFL Draft… Grades

You know that feeling after Christmas comes and goes, and you’re just having fun with your gifts?  Thats feeling I have right now. Being a Giants fan, I’m just relishing in the idea of all these draft picks contributing to another Giants postseason run. Thats right people. Get used to hearing “Manning to Hicks” for the next few seasons. But enough about my team, I want to talk to about all the teams and how they did in this year’s draft. My grades are always fair. In my eyes, if a team met every need, then thats at least a C depending on the quality of the players at the position of need. For example, the Raiders needed a strong safety in the second round and took someone that should not have been selected until the 5th round. That kind of stuff gets you an F, whereas the Browns very shrewdly traded down three times to get Alex Mack, a position of need. So here we go.  Let the grading begin.

Arizona Cardinals – The Cards really didn’t address all their needs and could have drafted an outside linebacker or two. I don’t know if they really needed to take two defensive backs in the third and fourth rounds. Chris Wells is a great pickup at 31 and he’ll be a good replacement for Edgerrin James. C-

Atlanta Falcons – Mike Smith knows defense and he did a great job in the draft securing players that the team really needed. Peria Jerry was a great pickup along the defensive line and William Moore should add some depth to the secondary. B

Baltimore Ravens – Ozzie Newsome doesn’t like to address his team’s needs in the draft so its hard to judge what he’s been able to do in the draft. I would’ve liked him to take a wide receiver because Derrick Mason is getting up there in age and their other receivers aren’t really gamebreakers. Michael Oher is a great player with a great story, and they got great value in Cedric Peerman in the sixth round. B-

Buffalo Bills – The Bills had a lot of needs and they didn’t address them all. I liked the fact that they got Aaron Maybin and traded back into the first round to take Eric Wood but what I like the most is that they drafted Nic Harris, who could become a very good linebacker with the right coaching. They could have taken a running back because Marshawn Lynch is suspended for the first three games of the season. C+

Carolina  Panthers – The Panthers didn’t address their need at backup quarterback and they need depth at wide receiver but for a team without a first round pick, I thought they did well. They got great value in the fourth and fifth rounds by taking Mike Goodson from Texas A&M and Duke Robinson from Oklahoma (who happens to be related to Smokey Robinson). C+

Chicago Bears – I really like what the Bears did in the draft because they didn’t have a day one pick at all. Juaquin Iglesias is one of the best route runners in college football, Marcus Freeman is very versatile and DJ Moore is an above average defensive back. B+

Cincinnati Bengals – The Bengals got a little lucky but took advantage of everyone passing on Rey Maualuga. Rey Rey is going to be good playing alongside his former Trojan teammate, Keith Rivers. I think Andre Smith is a better run blocker but will pick up the slack quickly. Outside of Chase Coffman, I don’t think any of their other picks will have huge impacts for a while. B-

Cleveland Browns – The Browns had a smart draft. They didn’t address all their needs, but they tried to and they got some smart players. Kaluka Maiava flew under the radar at USC with all their linebackers and he comes from a great pedigree. His uncle is The Rock. Brian Robiskie and Mohammed Massaquoi were solid picks at wide receiver, which leads me to believe the Browns are still trying to trade Braylon Edwards. B+

Dallas Cowboys – I hate Dallas as much any other team but I have to admit, they draft well. A lot of their starters have been drafted in the later rounds including Tashard Choice, Marion Barber, Patrick Crayton, just to name a few. We may not be able to name a lot of the guys they drafted (all of whom were taken in the 3rd round or later) but they met all their needs and I wouldn’t be surprised if those players turned out to be important parts of the Cowboys organization. A

Denver Broncos – I will continue to say it. The Broncos are stupid for taking Knowshon Moreno. They didn’t even need a running back but they took one anyway. What they needed was a pass rusher and they let Everette Brown pass by them several times. They didn’t address their needs at safety and on special teams. I will give them credit for Alphonso Smith, Robert Ayers and Kenny McKinley, but not too much credit. C-

Detroit Lions – Its hard not to like what the Lions did. I don’t think the Brandon Pettigrew pick was smart, but they don’t really have a threat at tight end. I would have gone with a pass rusher in that spot. Derrick Williams wasa  good pickup and he should have some success the way other young receivers have had in Denver. B

Green Bay Packers – The Packers didn’t have too many needs but they went above and beyond expectations. BJ Raji was a no-brainer but trading back into the first round to take Clay Matthews was very smart. Matthews comes from a strong football background and could be a cornerstone for that franchise for years. B+

Houston Texans – I understand why the Texans wouldn’t want to take a running back early on, but to not take one at all bothers me because they do need someone to split carries with Steve Slaton. Also they aren’t very deep at wide receiver and they didn’t take one. C-

Indianapolis Colts – The Colts needed a linebacker and didn’t take one. Donald Brown was a good pick up but Rey Maualuga was there and he doesn’t really fit into that Tony Dungy style of defense but Jim Caldwell is calling the shots now. Fili Moala was also a solid pick because it gives them a different look up the middle on defense. Moala could help free up some blockers from Freeney and Mathis. B-

Jacksonville Jaguars – For a team that seemed to be interested in taking Mark Sanchez, they didn’t address any need at quarterback. I also like the value they’d be getting from Tiquan Underwood from Rutgers. Not too many people hear about him because of Kenny Britt but he’s talented. C

Kansas City Chiefs – In my mind, the Chiefs blew a chance to take a really good player in Aaron Curry. I can understand why they would want to take a pass rusher but Tyson Jackson is not a top five pick, and you don’t waste the third overall pick on a guy who’s not top five material. Jackson’s good, but not that good. If you can trade down and still get him, do it. The Chiefs also neglected to take a linebacker or a safety, two positions they needed to address. D

Miami Dolphins – The Dolphins did well, bringing in Vontae Davis late in the first round and getting Pat White in the second. The Dolphins used that Wildcat formation well and will be adding a new look with White. I also think that getting some depth at wide receiver was a good idea with Brian Hartline. I think they could have taken a defensive end to replace Vonnie Holliday, but they might be able to bring back Jason Taylor. A

Minnesota Vikings – The Vikings addressed all their needs, they brought in Percy Harvin, who can be great if he stays out of trouble. I like Jasper Brinkley, and Phil loadholt wll join his former Sooner teammate Adrian Peterson. Good draft. B+
New England Patriots – I think Patrick Chung might have been taken a little too early, but thats my only issue. Darius Butler was a solid pick and Bill Belichick always finds guys that are versatile. B+

New York Jets – The Jets were the talk of the draft. Sanchez is a great pick for them. He’s marketable, he’s a great player, and he’s a leader. I don’t know if that’s going to translate into wins, but he’ll work out. The Jets’ aggressiveness didn’t allow them to draft a wide receiver, which is what they really needed, but I like what they did to get Shonn Greene, even though it might have been a bit much. A+

New York Giants – Hakeem Nicks is a great pick. Rhett Bomar might have been unncessary but he was once one of the best high school quarterbacks in the country, and his own stupidity cost him his position at Oklahoma. He’ll develop into a very good backup. The Giants filled all their needs. Clint Sintim reminds me of Mathius Kiwanuka because he’s a linebacker that could also play on the line. William Beatty could develop into a good right tackle to eventually replace McKenzie, Ramses Barden is a project but he’s 6′6″ and Stoney Woodson got rave reviews from his old coach, Steve Spurrier.  A

Oakland Raiders – I think Al Davis forgets that he owns a football team and thinks its track and field. I don’t care if Darius Heyward-Bey ran a 3.62 40 yard dash, Michael Crabtree was the best receiver in this year’s draft and they passed on him. And then to make matters worse, they drafted some safety no one knows. F

Philadelphia Eagles – I have to hand it to the Eagles. They know how to draft. They got valuable players all throughout the draft. LeSean McCoy is like another Brian Westbrook, Victor Harris is a very good defensive back and can play both corner and safety, and Cornelius Ingram could have very well been a first round pick, or at least the first tight end taken if he had been completely healthy. A+

Pittsburgh Steelers – Its hard to stay on top when a team is usually drafting in the late first round. The Steelers needed corners and receivers to replace Bryant McFadden and Nate Washington and they got guys to put in those spots. A

San Diego Chargers – The Charfers passed on a special player in Rey Maualuga but so did everyone else. Between Larry English, Demetrius Byrd, and Kevin Ellison, the Chargers had a solid draft. B

San Francisco 49ers – The Niners got the steal of the draft with Crabtree at 10. I think Nate Davis is a good pick because it gives them someone to develop if Shaun Hill goes south and Alex Smith continues to underachieve. Ricky Jean-Francois is a very good defensive tackle even though I think he should have stayed in school for another year, and Glen Coffee is another one of those Alabama running backs like Darren McFadden and Felix Jones. B+

Seattle Seahawks – Even though the Seahawks didn’t necessarily need Aaron Curry, it was a good pick and now they have a very good linebacking corps. Mike Teel was a good pickup and he’ll learn well behind Matt Hasselbeck. Max Unger can play both center and tackle, so that should be fun for the team, and Deon Butler is a speedster. B-

St. Louis Rams – Outside of Jason Smith and James Laurinaitis, the Rams draft was pretty average. C+

Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Josh Freeman was what they needed but I don’t like the fact that they didn’t get anyone to replace Warrick Dunn or Derrick Brooks… not that it would be easy to do. B-

Tennessee Titans – Kenny Britt was a great pick for them, and they took another Rutgers product in Jason McCourty. I’ve seen Jared Cook in action and I like what I see from him. B

Washington Redskins – The Redskins were patient and got a steal in Brian Orakpo. He should have been a top five pick but I guess the Chiefs like Jackson better. The Browns valued a center more and traded down and it ended up becoming the perfect storm for the Skins. They address their need at linebacker and the Skins defense should be very solid. B

There were a few guys I’m surprised didn’t get drafted. Rudy Carpenter, Cullen Harper, Chase Daniel, Graham Harrel, Brian Hoyer, and John Parker Wilson are all solid quarterbacks. Some of them were Heisman candidates at one point. PJ Hill, Marlon Lucky, Ian Johnson, Brandon Ore, and Kory Sheets were very productive running backs. Lucky had a great week at the Senior Bowl. Quan Cosby, Jon Cooper, and Alex Boone are all names we’ve heard. Darry Beckwith, Dannell Ellerbe, and Worrell Williams were productive and could produce in the NFL on special teams. Kevin Ogletree was a guy I watched throughout high school and college, I really hope he gets a look and maybe signs on somewhere as undrafted free agent. Maybe all of these guys can catch on somewhere. Some of the NFL’s best players have been undrafted free agents.